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| GN-05 "THE SOJOURNERS"
Excerpt From "Abraham and God" ABRAM: If I ever get to Scotland, I'll look you up. Maybe we can play a little golf. GOD: You'd enjoy it. Communing with nature, walking all over the countryside. . . ABRAM: If you have to walk, forget it. I'm too old. Hey, maybe you should give each person a little ox cart, and hecould ride around. GOD: Not a bad idea. But that's not why I'm here. Abram, I'm God. ABRAM: (He looks God up and down.) You don't look like the god I worship. GOD: And what god do you worship? What does he look like? ABRAM: I worship Baal. Baal's made of stone, and he just kind of sits there. He doesn't move unless we carry him. GOD: Well, if he can't get around, he can't be much of a god, can he? ABRAM: I guess not. Look, if you're God, do something that will impress me. (He pauses.) I know. Read my mind! GOD: Look, I'm not "Karnak the Great." I'm God. ABRAM: (Laughing.) Well, if you can't read my mind-- GOD: All right, all right. Start thinking. (He pauses.) Okay. You're hoping to get 70 cents a pound for the lambs, even though the market is down. You don't want to give Lot Sarai's stew recipe. And you think I'm crazy. How's that? ABRAM: WOW! I don't believe it! That's great! Do you do card tricks? GOD: Yes, but that's not why I am here. Abram, I've got a job for you. ABRAM: Why me? I'm not even sure that I believe in you. GOD: That's all right, because I believe in you. Just don't fight me, and I'll take care of the rest. Let me work in you, and you'll know my grace and you'll believe. Okay? ABRAM: Okay. Now what? GOD: Look, I'm a square shooter. I won't hold anything back. This is going to be tough. I want you to leave here and follow me to a new land. There you and Sarai will have a child. I'm going to make you the father of a great nation. And finally, you will be a blessing to all humanity. ABRAM: (He laughs hysterically.) You're kidding! Look, I'm 75 years old. I can barely walk three miles, and Sarai's "O. B." said she'd never have children. I think you've picked the wrong man. GOD: Abram, you're the right man. You're the right man because I chose you. Just let me work in you, and everything will happen just as I have said. Return to Sojourners Drama Listing Excerpt From "Abraham and Sarah" ABRAHAM: Okay. But first, trust me. I haven't had a drop of wine to drink since last night. SARAH: Why would I think that? ABRAHAM: Because what I am about to tell you might sound like the delirious ravings of a drunk. SARAH: Okay. I trust you. If you say you didn't have a drop to drink, I'll believe you. Now go ahead. The suspense is killing me. ABRAHAM: You'd better sit down. SARAH: I don't need to sit down. Now out with it. ABRAHAM: Okay. Here goes. God visited me today. SARAH: (She is stunned and sits down immediately.) Oh, Abram, you said you hadn't had a drop to drink. ABRAHAM: I haven't! Sarai, I really did talk to God. SARAH: Be quiet. If the neighbors hear you, they'll take you to the old peoples' home. Besides, stone idols don't talk . . . (she pauses.) . . . do they? ABRAHAM: This was no stone idol. He looked like an ordinary human being. SARAH: How do you know he wasn't? What did he do to prove that he was God? ABRAHAM: Sarai, he read my mind. SARAH: Oh, Abram. I suppose he did card tricks, too. I knew it. The sun finally got to you. If I've told you once, I've told you a hundred times, "Put something on your head." ABRAHAM: Sarai, please listen. He had an important message for me. SARAH: This is crazy . . . but go ahead. ABRAHAM: God said he would lead us to a new land. A land so far away that we'd have to leave everything behind. A land flowing with milk and honey. Our own land. He said, we'd have a son. In fact, so many descendants that we'd never be able to count them all. SARAH: (She laughs hysterically.) A son! (More laughter.) Did you tell your God that you're 75 and that I'm pushing 61? ABRAHAM: Of course I told him. But that didn't seem to faze him. Click Here to Order or Contact Us Return to Sojourners Drama Listing
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