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| AC-09 "THE Most Wonderful Life"
Excerpt From Act 2 - "Downtown" Joe: (He reaches into his pocket, pulls out some money, and hands it to the man.) Here, this ought to get you a room and some food. Man: (He takes it.) Wow! A fifty pound note. Joe: What are you talking about? That's a fifty-dollar bill. Right there is U. S. Grant's-- Wolf: That's the Queen. Remember, no Jesus, no Revolution, no U. S. Grant. Joe: (He gives the money to the people and they exit. He speaks in anger.) All right, what's going on here? Wolf: What do you mean? Joe: I mean, what's going on? Have you cast some kind of spell on me? Hypnotized me? Wolf: No, Joe. I'm just showing you what the world would be like if there were no Jesus. Joe: This is not funny. Wolf: You're right. Joe: Make it stop, now! (A man comes in carrying a child.) Wolf: May we help you? Man 2: My son is sick, very sick. He has a high fever and I have no place to take him. Joe: Take him to a hospital. St. Luke's is right down the block. Man 2: What is a hospital? I have been to three doctors, but none of them will treat my son because I am not wealthy. Joe: The hospital admits anyone. Come on, I'll go with you. Wolf: There is no hospital, Joe. It was the Christian Church that began hospitals for the ill. Before that the average man just waited to die. The only medical help available was for the wealthy. Joe: Stop it! Wolf: Joe, when the great plagues swept across Europe, it was Christians who stayed behind to care for the dying. Everyone else ran off, but the Christians stayed because they were needed, and they knew that even if they did die, they would go to heaven anyway. They weren't afraid of illness. They knew only how to give love. Joe: Look, I just can't believe-- Wolf: The first real hospital where anyone could go for medical help was founded by Saint Basil of Caesaria in 331 AD. It was the first place that had beds for the sick and round-the-clock care. Joe: (He looks after the man and the boy who are walking offstage.) Wait! (He turns back to Wolf.) What's going to happen to them? Wolf: The boy has a case of pneumonia. If there were a hospital, he could be treated. But there is no Jesus, therefore no hospitals, so the boy will die. Excerpt From Act 3 - "Outside the Church" Wolf: I can't finish the job. That's up to you and Jesus Christ. Joe: What are you talking about? Wolf: You just don't get it, do you? Joe: (In frustration.) No, I don't. Wolf: Oh, Joe, I am the answer to-- Joe: My prayers? Wolf: No, your wife's and children's prayers. Actually, your prayer life stinks. (He pulls out a little book and flips through the pages.) Last time you prayed was 1994, and that was to make a putt on the seventeenth green. But that really didn't count because, quite honestly, God doesn't care if you make the putt or not. So those prayers just go to the Dead Prayer Office. Joe: Dead Prayer Office? Look, just speak plain English. What the-- Wolf: Uh, uh, watch your language. Joe: Look, I am getting tired-- Wolf: (Irritated.) You're tired. How tired do you think God is? Joe: What do you mean? Wolf: I mean, God has laid everything out for you. You have all the evidence that you need, all the testimony, yet you refuse to give it any credence. Joe: It's just-- Wolf: Just what? Joe: Well, if I'd had the proper upbringing when I was a kid-- Wolf: (Totally disgusted) Oh, give me a break! How long and how far do you think you can ride that horse? It's dead, so quit beating it! You're not a kid anymore. You're supposed to be a grown up. Joe: But those were my formative years. Wolf: You've been watching too many TV Talk shows. (He pretends he is an announcer.) On today's show meet grown ups whose religious faith was stunted in the formative years. Did they become ax murderers, terrorists, and bank robbers because their parents didn't let them go to Sunday School? Find out for yourself. (He drops the announcer persona and looks at Joe.) GROW UP! Joe: What do you want me to do? Wolf: I don't want you to do a stinking thing. (Pointing Heavenward) Frankly, I think we've got too many lawyers up there now. Joe: (Suspiciously.) Up where? Click Here to Order or Contact Us
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